Mirror, Mirror

I know many consider the Myers-Briggs no different than astrology, but I find it absolutely revealing and helpful for self-knowledge. Every INTJ description I read resonates and feels like a true reflection of who I am; I don't feel like I'm reading about a type so much as I'm reading about myself. That includes this bit from Psychology Junkie about How Each Myers-Briggs Type Reacts to Stress (and How to Help!).

INTJ – The Mastermind

What stresses out an INTJ:
– Being in an environment that doesn’t appreciate their skills, visions, or ideas.
– Not enough alone time. Too much extraverting.
– Too much noise or sensory input.
– Working with those they see as lazy, incompetent, or ignorant.
– Having to pay attention to too many details at once.
– Being in unfamiliar environments.
– Having their well-settled plans disrupted.
– Too much focus on the here-and-now.
– Not being able to use their intuition to envision the future.

When in a state of stress, the INTJ can feel an immense amount of pressure – as if everything is on the line. To an INTJ, this often means the ability to produce something significant is somehow stifled. They may find themselves overwhelmed, and thinking about ideas and options that don’t have a productive end. As stress increases, the INTJ can become argumentative and disagreeable. Social interaction becomes increasingly difficult; and they may become preoccupied with obsessive ideas and plans. They may start to spend a massive amount of time fighting horrible thoughts, and feelings of worthlessness. They will ruminate about their mistakes, inadequacies and weaknesses, and stop progress on a project for fear of failure. In a case of chronic stress, the INTJ may fall into the grip of their inferior function; extraverted sensing. When this happens, they may give into self-destructive indulgences, like over-eating, over-exercising, alcoholism, or buying lots of useless items. They may obsessively clean or re-organize files.

How to help an INTJ experiencing stress:
– Give them space, and time alone to process their thoughts and feelings.
– Reduce sensory stimulation like noise, TV, radio, or bright lights.
– Let them express their thoughts and feelings without judgment. Understand that they may be irrational.
– Don’t give them advice. This will only make them feel worse.
– Give them a break from responsibilities.
– Encourage them to get enough sleep at night.
– Help them lighten their schedule, or cancel unnecessary activities.
– After some time of solitude, encourage them to get a change of scenery by going outdoors.

The last couple of sentences of the full paragraph. When I was in college, running cross country and track, I wrote a very personal research-paper-crossed-with-essay on the topic of exercise addiction. When my first marriage was strained and failing, I went from basically out of shape to spending every night becoming one of the better triathletes (considering age and size) in our metro area. Now that I have two little boys and am committed to giving them all of my personal time, with virtually no time for myself or exercise . . . well, let's just say I'm really dreading my annual physical next week because I know it's going to be bad, very, very bad.

I happen to be wearing headphones right now, even though no music or audio is coming through them.

I really miss meditating while getting lost in the woods.

The Facebook status that keeps playing in my head even though I've resisted sharing it: "Why do you hate me so much?"

I'm so, so very tired.